Change is coming...

My life has changed drastically over the last couple of weeks, and will continue to change over the next couple of months. I have looked forward to this change for nearly a year, but I have to admit that it is more bittersweet than it is exciting.

June 20th was my last day of work so I am officially unemployed for the next three years. Turning in my badge and walking out that door for the last time was so liberating! While it was an incredible job where I received licenses and experience, I learned it wasn't what I wanted to do the rest of my life. Hence, law school.

Shortly after quitting, I started nannying for my sister and watching my little nugget Baby B. Spending time with him is so rewarding. It's amazing how I've only known him for 4 to 5 months and I already love him so much. I'm grateful for having the opportunity to spend time with him before I go. However, it will make it harder to leave knowing that the next time I see him he will probably be crawling, walking, or talking.

About a week after I quit my job, Jake and I finally rented our house out. The renters wanted to be in as soon as possible. They signed a contract and a week later were moved into our house. I underestimated how much work it was to move. Jake and I went on a boating vacation with his family after they signed the contact. When we got back we had only 2 days to be out of our house. Needless to say, I will be giving myself much more time to move in the future. Now, we are living with my mom and step-dad at their house for the next month until we move to San Diego. This transition was harder for me since that was mine and Jake's first home together that we built from scratch. I was getting some doubts about the huge decision I made to attend law school when my friend James gave me some really good advice...."Take a picture, have a flashback of all the memories you've had there, turn around and never look back. A better life awaits!" Honestly, this is the exact advice I needed in order to look forward to what is coming.

Today, I came across this quote: "All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another."

I've lived in Utah and been surrounded by family nearly my whole life. It is a part of who I am today and who I will be in the future. It is only natural that I feel a little apprehension in leaving everything I have known here, and those that I love here. This quote made me realize that change can bring sadness no matter how much you longed for it. The important thing to remember is that you have to look forward to the future and not look back to the past with longing. Embrace those memories and enjoy them but live your life and look forward to what is in store. That is what I am choosing to do now.

In less than two months I will be going to law school in one of the most amazing cities in this country. I will have my wonderful husband by my side, and a phone and iChat to talk to those that I miss.